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David Unsworth praises supporters as ‘Our Fifth Man’

Stand-in Everton manager David Unsworth has taken time out to highlight the importance of the Toffees supporters in the club’s title challenge.

“It’s as simple as this. They’re our 5th man. The teams we’ve been putting out this season have only really had the impact of playing  with 3 or at best 4 players.” The former legend and now disgraced manager said. “But with our passionate crowd making the difference we really feel like we have 5 guys out there. It makes such a difference.”

Having that 5th player stops the side losing by double figures and being relegated by Christmas.

“The stony silences. The jeers and boos.  The sight of young fans leaving at half time and not coming back.  It really spurs the  players on to dig deep and really scrap for that all important moral victory of losing by less than 5 goals. Sometimes. ”

Everton fans have been seen making the long drudge to the games muttering to themselves about there being no rainbows without rain and that there hasn’t been this much rain since fucking Noah’s ark.

The only thing keeping them going is their new club hero Dejan Lovren, who is almost single-handedly keeping the Premier League trophy from Anfield for at least another season.

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