Wenger with Arsenal
Arsenal

Wenger planning ‘apocalyptic’ December after missing out in November

Sources inside the Emirates have revealed that Arsene Wenger is planning for a complete capitulation in December after a surprisingly solid November. Traditionally, the Gunners fall apart over 4 glorious weeks in the 11th month of the year, but they’ve incredibly come this time through relatively unscathed. Our source close to Wenger has reliably informed us that the Arsenal manager is busy plotting a hilariously inept December:

The 5-0 trashing of Huddersfield to finish the month off has really put the gaffer on edge. We’re in our cherished position of 4th, have a short injury list and even Jack Wilshere looks like a player again. The boss is a little freaked out. His December plan will include a home defeat by Man United on the weekend preferably by a couple of goals, before we draw 0-0 mid-week to BATE. Southampton will score hopefully score a last minute winner the following week, while we also have eyes on the League Cup quarter-final against the Hammers. If Joe Hart can lead his side to victory at the Emirates, December’s job will be nearly complete and the jinx will be over

Wenger in internal crisis mode

While the outside world looks on at a seemingly calm Wenger and Arsenal squad, the mood inside the camp is fraught with tension. Theo Walcott hasn’t scored in weeks, but that’s actually unrelated. Once the December comedy show commences, the weird feeling around the club will go away and Arsenal in crisis will be back with a bang.

Feature Image: Getty

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