Are you looking for a magical place, where your every hope and dream is snatched away just when it’s about to come true?
A fantastic place where no matter what you do, you’ll never succeed and will be forced to blame others for your misfortune and incompetence day after day forever?
Welcome to Inter-land! A world of blue and black where no matter who you sign it’ll end in misery!
While you’re here why not:
– Wait in the rain for our trophy-train ride which goes off the rails every Christmas.
– Experience our ‘house of champion horrors’ where we keep photos of all our top players, like Ronaldo, Vieri or Bergkamp, who never won anything.
– Enjoy a warm cup of sour grape juice at our cafe as you watch yet another season of failure and blame referee after referee.
– Play a thrilling game of fantasy football by signing players like Di Maria, Messi, Naingolan, Pastore and Suarez to your just-a-dream-team.
– Stay at our beautiful heartbreak hotel – where you can weep freely at all the stars who decided to leave for better teams. Cry in bed over Mourinho, Ronaldo, Roberto Carlos, Coutinho, Simeone and many more.
Experience the thrill of building up all your hopes for yet another season here at Interland, only for them all to go to shit by January. Book early to avoid non-disappointment.
Get your tickets today for a taste of genuine loss and misery. Or just buy a black and blue shirt. The choice is yours.
Image courtesy hotelsclick.com