1) Guardiola’s triple word score in Words with friends.
Occasionally looking up to make sure Chelsea still hadn’t made it out of their fucking half, Pep looked agitated at times from how challenging things were getting on his phone screen but he really pulled it out of the box in his game with Valverde, laying down a slew of letters to spell out ‘humiliation’.
2. The 125 Real Madrid scouts not knowing whether to cheer or cry when news came through that Messi scored to beat Atletico.
There to watch the majority of the Chelsea squad, grouped behind two day old copies of Marca with holes cut out for the eyes, all their phones went off in unison when the little Argentinian broke hearts in the red half of Madrid. What do you call it when your enemy’s enemy is also your enemy?
3. Danny Drinkwater, cavorting around the grass wide eyed like a dog in snow for the first time, visibly talking himself out of asking everyone around him for their autograph.
You could see moments from this game framed in black and white in his den at home, showing them to his grandkids ‘this was year before grandad was back in conference I tell thee, but what a grand day.’
4. Gary Neville with his thesaurus out trying to think up new terms to criticise teams that aren’t Man Utd
We all know there’s a class of ‘92 WhatsApp group where they swap memes ridiculing the smallest mistake for hours.
5. Wenger shooting up from his couch at home to roar at full time “See! It wasn’t just me!”
While at the same time steadfastly ignoring all the missed calls from Kroenke on his Nokia 3210.
Feature image: highlightsfootball.com